This is a time where you are learning to slowly accept responsibility for the way you are though your relationships with your self and others. This energy can manifest in several ways. Some examples of this energy would be an intense fear of failure or anxiety creeping up on you. Maybe you feel like you are not where you wanted to be at this age and you are bothered by this immensely. You may have to many demands taking a toll on you at this time and in response you feel the intense need to try to control or manipulate these situations to your advantage. It could be a my way or the highway scenerio regarding how you handle these demands. The lessons Saturn in this position brings will include learning to let go and trust in love, it will teach you to deal with buried feelings surrounding love that you might just be starting to aknowledge. Some areas surrounding the feelings you need to adress are communication, self perception and how you sexually express your self.
It’s important to consider what makes you happy at this time because you might be depressed, Saturn in the first house will do that. You are coming to terms with the reality that happiness is only a perception. Remember that it can be achieved by anyone, including you. With this influence it’s likely that you have been considering what you get out of your relationships with other people (romantic partners, your parents, children, friends, etc). It’s a time where many relationships that no longer serve you begin to become stressed. Saturn is teaching you to be realistic and accountable for who and where you are in these relationships, if you are not happy you will be taught to let go. If you have been responsible with your life in the past this transition can be easy, even satisfying, if not it can be a painful form of growth that will find the weakend areas of your life and force you to rebuild them so they can be stronger. Saturn is the cold hard truth and its teaching you the truth about who you are and where you are in life . If you have been avoiding taking care of your health, personal needs or self perception you will find your self being forced to work very hard to handle these issues responsibly and be accountable. For example, if you grew up with a verbally abusive father and he distorted your self image or body image by calling you, “stupid or fat,” it is time now to realize that the impact of the abuse needs to be dealt with in a healthy manner. It isn’t anyone’s fault when they have verbally abusive parents but it is up to us through which lens we decide to view ourselves through.